Anxiety Dreams

i woke up at 4:30 this morning from a dream in which, for the sake of some activisty project, my partner and i were moving into a new house, kind of in a garden, but not with other houses. Sort of aeon flux-y. Max from the L-Word is there and while i know my partner is there, shes’ not in the dream. she’s always just around the corner. As night falls we start closing the walls which are open, and made of canvas. and then slowly they materialize into glass walls and doors. But as the walls got more solid i realized that there are people coming in towards the house to out me and they have my real name and will out me to everyone in my life. Max is there to protect me but he can’t do too much because the house is made of canvas. My partner never comes out from around the corner.

There are things in my life other than my sometimes-closet. I mean, it’s really a small, though significant, portion of my life. And yet somehow it features regularly in my anxieties. I don’t know why.

4 thoughts on “Anxiety Dreams

  1. Stumbled upon your blog thru Twitter.
    Read some of your posts..
    I hail from India, so I do think I know the kind of situation you are in..All I can say is Best of Luck.. and Kudos to you for writting this blog..although I do understand that this is the place for you to empty your frustration…
    aah..will stop now. really don’t know how to sympathize or empathize with you…

    Best Wishes gal!

  2. @Go gal! : I haven’t really been on this blog for about two years, so I just saw your comment. Thanks for commenting. Things are as things are. I appreciate the empathy.

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