Enough about my love life. Let’s move on to more universal things, har har.
My ex was saying that she and I should sit down and start talking about queerness in a way that makes sense to our context. And that she and I should do it together because we bridge certain gaps when we’re together. We’d be a force to reckon with.
And my girlfriend said, last week, that Pakistan is no place to live. She said that you have no liberties, no life, no way to be yourself. There’s so much assessing and judging, so much scrutiny that you just can’t live here. She asked me how many lesbian couples I knew and I had to confess that I don’t know any.
So I read the above-linked blog post today and I thought, speaking (in my head) to the strange woman quoted by belledame, that sure, lady, marriage is the place where values come from and gay marriage means a change in values, and that scares the kack out of you and that’s fine. But talk to someone for whom the whole gay marriage conversation is a luxury or, more accurately, irrelevant. And your smooth-as-silk cool may be disturbed a bit when you find out that in both India and Pakistan, sodomy is punishable by life imprisonment under India and Pakistan Penal Codes Section 377 (thank you, Britannia, for that shit) and that in fact any “unnatural act” that involves penetration is so treated. So it’s not even a moral or ethical choice at this point. Being queer is illegal, flat-out.
So what use for marriage?
I guess all I’m saying is that the global discourse in gay rights is defined by, primarily, the US. And while, sitting here in what, for the purposes of gay rights work, really is a backwater, I get great support from the US gay rights movement, but its issues aren’t my issues. Which means I can’t ride on its coat tails anymore. I’ve never been to a pride parade and there was a time that I said I wasn’t interested in marching. Now I wouldn’t mind. But it’s also just a side thing, a distraction. Or a PR exercise, I don’t know. “We’re here, we’re queer, get used to it?” That’s not quite what our motto is. “We’re here, we’re queer, and we won’t get punished for it.” That’s more what we’re looking at. We’re here, we’re queer, do you know what that means? We’re here, we’re queer, just leave us the fuck alone. That sort of thing.
This isn’t a critique of anything I read. Just thinking aloud. I thought it would make more sense, be a more organized thought. But it isn’t. Sorry.